Chapter 42
Part 5
It brings me a melancholy sort of joy to see the children getting along so well with Nameless.
She is a very shy soul, having lived in solitude for more centuries than anyone knows, knowing only the beat of her own heart and the patterns of the winds in the sky. Though she is wild, she knows not the cruelty of evil men or Pokémon, nor the violent instincts which come from the need to fight for survival; she only knows Zerferia, her home, the skies which she has flown upon wings supreme and unchallenged. She has grown to be docile, respectful of other forms of life, willing to help those in need as a mother would help her hatchlings.
She knows her place in life; she has never needed to question it.
But the children ask her questions, endless questions, all which she is pleased to answer the best she can despite her limited grasp of the spoken word.
"I have been alive for a long time," she coos, in answer to Saura. "So long, I don't know how long. Memories drift as clouds in the wind drift, they go too far. Too far away to see. Too far away to chase. Memories and dreams become the same, and I don't tell which are flights imagined, and which are flights passed. But I know, there is very little worth remembering, in my life."
"Aren't you lonely up here?" asks Rautzen's brother. "Haven't you ever left Zerferia before?"
"I have gone south," she answers. "I have met with your followers of Rayquaza, in the past. But when I fly south, my heart urges me back, to return here, so I know I belong here, and not where else. When I am alone here, with the empty sky, I am happy."
I must smile to myself, remembering the time when I asked her all these same questions, and first felt the impossible thrill of befriending a legendary Pokémon.
When I was young, I was taught the legends were, in many ways, no different from every other creature of this earth, and that humanity hailed them as gods only because they did not know better. Mankind saw how Articuno's wings would grace the morning sky only once in a lifetime, bringing with her the winds of a winter blizzard. They saw how Kyogre would rise from the blue depths to bring rainfall to their famished lands. And so they would pray to these entities, worshipping their strength and rarity, their mastery over the elements and the weather, not understanding these 'gods' were merely species endangered by their difficulty in finding suitable mates and reproducing, hiding in the deepest corners of the earth just to prolong the process of extinction.
After having met one for myself, I still cannot say whether the humans were correct, or whether the beauty and power of the legendary Pokémon is the artistic expression of the gods themselves, their rarity intended and engineered, their purpose to teach the common creatures of the land the humility to bow to a higher power. But what I do know for certain is this: they are similar to us in many ways we often overlook.
"How did you make the wind go away?" Saura asks, relieved, like the rest of them, that the cold of Zerferia had shown mercy since Nameless came. "Do you have power over the weather?"
"I am the wind, and I am the snow," she replies, opening her wings once as though to illustrate. "Do you understand why you control your paws? Do you understand why your eyes close when you will it? So is it, with I, the forces of the sky obey commands when I will it, like my talons and my wings obey my command, and I do not understand how, but I don't need to."
"Why are you called Nameless?" Char wonders. "Did you pick the name for yourself?"
"When Pokémon began to speak with me, I didn't understand names," she explained, betraying shame in her voice. "They called me Articuno, and it made me… furious, to become sounds from the tongue, as though I was equal as nothing more than sounds. I believed it was disrespect. I did not understand it is necessary for speaking Pokémon to name things. They saw I was furious, and they asked me what I could be called. I told them, I didn't want a name. So they would called me Nameless. At the beginning, it confused me because it was a contradiction. But I thought about it, and then, it made me learn of the purpose a name. So I accepted the contradiction as my own name. "
Nameless has made great improvements in her speaking. But that is to be expected, for her teacher is none other than Legend. I can even hear some of his voice in her own. In a way, Legend's voice suits her; from the moment she learned to communicate verbally, it became clear she is as wise as she is majestic. She understands far more about life and the world than any simple Pokémon could hope to comprehend. She only needed to learn the words to communicate her thoughts. She has taught me much.
I sit back in this ditch of ours, watching as Nameless enjoys her chat with the tiny Pokémon crowding around her feet.
I see her, the incarnate breath of the gods, submitting herself as the companion to a lowly group of mortals.
I see Lily, a Pokémon who trusts me beyond any other Pokémon in the world. One who has no one else in the world to turn to, but me.
I see Scythe, an old partner of mine, perhaps the most cunning mind in Ambera, standing at my side as an equal.
And I wonder if maybe things are finally coming together. I wonder if, for once, I am doing something right.
I am Calamar Morfeaux Distragnatia, or "Prince" as my Amberan brethren know me. Some hail me as a natural-born leader. Some say that my team is one of the best there is, listed on the same breath as Team Defect, Team Regret, Team Absolution, Team Priority, and Team Remorse. Some call me a hero.
They can call me what they want, but it is not that simple.
Seventy-nine years ago, upon a foreign land, I hatched to a human master called King Davious, and to his loyal Infernape servant, King Morfeaux Bladden Distragnatia, my father. Together, they ruled a small coastal country upon a far-away continent, a people known among man for their martial strength, their unbreakable Pokémon army. Davious sat in command of the humans, and Morfeaux in command of the Pokémon. It was my birthright to one day take the place of my father as king.
Before the yolk had even been washed from my fur, my training had begun. My father taught me the arts of politics, self-mastery, and leadership. Before my first evolution, I had learned about my fire, and what happens when it goes out, and what happens when it blazes. I learned how to manage Pokémon under my command, how to inspire them, how to punish them, and how to lie to them.
I thought my purpose in life was pre-determined, but I was wrong.
There was a disagreement between my father and his master. As punishment for his insubordination, Davious ordered that I be banished. Before my father's eyes, I was knocked out and carried away. They trapped me in a Poké Ball, escorted me across two continents, and dropped me in the wild. I never saw my home, or my father, again.
When I found my way to Ambera, I had all the makings of a leader. First and foremost I was an expert at doing what Pokémon do best: battling. I knew the martial arts. I knew pyrotechnics. And I knew how to use them in conjunction to defend myself. Secondly, I had political and leadership skills. I knew how to manage a team. I knew how to make other Pokémon trust me.
I was proud back then. I did not fully understand myself. When I formed a resistance team, I convinced myself I knew what I was doing, and the other members at the Gold Division seemed to think I did as well. Alakazam, Scythe, Aether, Indigo… they all accepted me as a capable ally, a valuable asset to their cause. And I believed so, too; it was difficult to believe otherwise as we stood eye-to-eye with the best of our allies and we pulled through every task we were given.
But one day, the pieces of the puzzle started to come together in my mind… I began to realize the truth. Perhaps… I was not to be trusted after all.
I never told the team why I moved to the Emerald Division. That is because, back then, I didn't know the answer myself. I just knew I had to leave. Decades later, I realized why the urge had been so strong: my success and my comfort began to remind me of my service to the humans, and so I began to distrust. I began to expect some hidden treachery, some reason they would find to banish me or ruin my happiness there.
That is the last lesson my father taught me: when things are going too well, it means something is wrong. And so, I had to get out of the Gold Division as fast as I could, so the cold of Fort Emerald would clear my mind. I had to see for myself what was wrong.
It was not until I stood with my team, surrounded by the undefeatable foes who had captured us… as I watched helplessly as Rayquaza's Clutch burned to the ground… that I had found it.
I realized I had chosen to become a leader because that's all I knew how to do. That's all I had been taught since hatching, to stand in command of other Pokémon. But… to what end? I was no leader. I was merely playing the role of a leader. At heart, I had no guiding principles. I had no courage. I had no real reason to oppose the Master, he had never harmed me personally until now.
I… was a fraud.
I realized I had modeled my team after Scythe's, thinking it was a good team structure to copy. Vallon was designated as my foil, to challenge my ideas, like Daemon. Legend was my heart and soul, to keep my spirit lifted, like Rautzen. Azel the Salamence was my egotistical dragon, much like Scythe's Charizard. Tangrind the Heracross was my master strategist, the closest thing I had to Scythe's own mind.
For the longest time, I also needed another member, someone whom I was bound to by a solemn promise. Someone to play the role Shander played on Team Remorse. Someone to constantly remind me that I was not only a leader, but a servant.
That eventually became Lily.
And when I "saved" the Emerald Division… my ultimate sacrificial act, my ultimate heroic deed, as it will forever be known…
I was responsible for the deaths of hundreds of the division's Pokémon. The attack was imminent. Lucario said we should surrender. I said we should stand up and fight. I insisted that we should try to use the Call to our advantage. I called many of the Division's warriors to stand at my side, and so my Silver Division was born. The Emerald Division got away, to live another day… and the Silver Division stayed in their place, to die for them.
I realized it was not some master plan of mine. It was not my wisdom or my tactical knowledge speaking. It was not a calculated risk. What was it, then? Pride. It was blind pride, the fury of a roaring fire, which caused me to stand up to Lucario that fateful day and insult him for cowardice. It was me, a little child, standing in the name of my father, defying the king…
The army of Sicarius forced me to watch Rayquaza's clutch burn to the ground. They made me watch as they slew the army which I led. They made me watch as my own teammates, Vallon and Azel, bled to death at my feet. And thinking the Emerald Division was no more, they let me live, so that I could spread the word to future generations that the Master is not to be defied.
And I saw the fire consuming my home, and the ashes which drifted down and mixed with the snowflakes… and I realized that it had come from inside of me. It was my fire. And it meant… nothing.
Today, I have Legend to paint the event in a positive light for me. Thanks to him, generations will know the story of a brave struggle, a sacrifice, and the hero who saved Lucario and all of his followers—me—and not the story of a meaningless tragedy which tore out the heart of the Emerald Division and smashed it into the snow.
We salvaged the Rayquaza statue and laid it in pieces in the new fortress, never to be erected again. To some, it remains as a reminder of the power of our great enemy, and what he will to with us if he is not checked. To others… It remains as a reminder of what really happened back then, even while it seems life goes on as normal each day.
And now… here I am… guiding this little human-turned-Charmander to meet Dialga.
Scythe is absolutely correct in accusing me of using Char to redeem myself. But… why is it bad that I want to help him? That I want to bring him to Dialga so that he might regain the memories of his humanity, and so his powerful ability might be brought under his control? Scythe seems so intent to keep me away from Char, as if I would somehow harm him… I just don't understand. I don't understand why such a rational and perceptive mind as Scythe's would fail to realize that I mean no harm. I am only here to make sure this expedition works, because I know it would not work without my intervention. There are too many unknown variables Scythe does not seem to have planned for…
I do not believe the attitude he has. We were partners! Why can't we work together now? Why must he keep secrets from me and try to force me away? Is he… trying to get back at me for leaving him back at the Gold Division?
Is it because he doesn't trust me to Char, because of how I treated Lily?
Part of me isn't surprised in the slightest that Lily came with us. After all, when I abandoned her to the Watchers to save Char, and when she miraculously survived, and when I promised her that I'll never abandon her again… what did I do next? I promptly abandoned her again.
Perhaps Scythe is right; compared to him, I'm a pathetic guardian to those I claim to protect, whereas he so viciously guards Char from me…
Lily has expressed a desire to leave me and go be on another team. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised at that, either. She wants to relieve me of the promise I made to her that I would stay at her side, and never let her fall into the hands of someone who would abuse her for her power. Now she came running to me, and she says she feels sorry for being a burden to me, says I deserve to live my own life for once, rather than having the Call dictate everything I do. She says that if Lucario will banish us, that I should stay here, and continue to be the great leader hero that I am, and that she will be able to take care of herself.
I… don't know what to tell her.
Should I admit that she is the reason I have made it this far? Should I tell her that, if it was not for the promise I made to her, I would have disbanded the Silver Division and simply joined the Master, simply from my own shame and loss of purpose? Should I tell her that I doubt my life has any meaning apart from her?
No… I can't. I shouldn't frighten her by saying these things. It would only confuse her more.
But… The ultimate truth of the matter is that this expedition is all I have left. This, the final stretch, the final desperate attempt to understand the power known as the Call… If this falls through, and if Lily leaves to find another place in life, then I don't have the slightest idea where life will lead. It is as though I am blind, and I just can't see any of the days past that point, in hopes they don't actually exist.
If it comes to pass, I suppose I will simply hear Legend tell me why we carry on each day, and I will go from there.
They can call me what they want, but I am no true leader. I am no true hero. But once this expedition is complete, I can say that I have finally done all I can. I can say that I have fulfilled the purpose on which the Silver Division was founded. I can say I tried.
Evening comes, and the children are still going on and on with questions for Nameless. I would feel bad for her, but she does really enjoy this kind of attention; she admits it helps her practice language.
"What do you eat?" Saura asks her, as we were discussing the likelihood of having a meal this evening. "You… eat other Pokémon, right?"
"Brown furry ones," she replies nonchalantly. "It's hard to find else. But I have hunger doesn't come often. Only some years, I am overcome with hunger."
"Are you hungry today?" Saura asks, betraying some nervousness.
"No," she replies. "I feel fine."
Her mind changes quickly, though, when she sees me pull two monstrous, sparkling apples from the bag which Scythe carries. She watches with intense interest as he slices them in fourths and as we all eat our fill from these wonderful fruits. I know full well how enrapturing the scent is, and I see how she stares at them with pleading eyes as it wafts up to her. It tugs on my heart strings.
Finally, I ask her if she would like some, and I give her to two remaining fourths. She pecks at them, and they disappear with frightening speed.
"I have never eaten a plant before," she says soon after. "I have a good impression now. I could learn to enjoy eating a plant."
Of course, this sends a shiver of fright into both Lily and Saura. I cannot help but chuckle. Realizing the implications of her words, Nameless laughs along, and reassures the two children that as long as she is around, no Pokémon will be eating them.
Then, she surprises me… because, after several straight hours of answering questions, she decides to ask one herself.
"I wonder sometimes, what I am," she says to the children. "Why are you so happy to see me? Why do other Pokémon regard me so high? Am I so special?"
"Hey, you're a legendary Pokémon!" Rautzen's brother laughs. "You are awesome! Everyone wants to meet legendary Pokémon!"
"But, what does that mean, to call me, a legendary Pokémon?" Nameless asks. "I am called that a lot. What is legendary? I know, the word means that they told stories of me. But they told stories of Prince too. So why is not Prince legendary too? How it is different? I wonder sometimes…"
"Well… legendary Pokémon are really rare, for one thing," Saura says. "Everyone thinks that there's only one of you in the whole world! And some don't even think you exist at all! They think you're a myth!"
"There are others of my kind," Nameless claims. "I have seen them, very very long ago, flying the sky… but I never approach… I was shy."
"Also… you're really powerful, you know!" the Raichu beams again. "You can control the snowstorms! And you could probably beat any other Pokémon in a battle that you wanted! So… everyone is happy to have you on their side!"
"But I am… as weak as you," she says, again with a sheepish tilt of her head. "With weakness, there is fear. I have no fear when I am here, with my sky. But… I have gone south before, where it is warm… and I have felt deep fear. Prince wanted a battle to me, once, because he said Pokémon enjoy to battle for fun. So I try, and I defeat him. But then, we battle again, this time three of his friends help, and they all battle to me at once. And I fail that battle. If four Pokémon can defeat me… how strong am I, if there are countless of Pokémon in the south?"
"But… but… that doesn't mean anything!" Ray insists. "There are rules to battles, you know! Pokémon are weak to some things and strong to other things. Prince was probably using fire on you, that's how he beat you! You know, the weakness web? Fire-water-leaf? You… just need to be trained. Learn to counter your weaknesses. Then you could be unstoppable in any battle!"
"But, why…" Nameless says. "Why would I learn to battle? I don't enjoy battle… … I feel deep fear, whenever I think of battle…"
Ray looks as though he was about to have another comeback, but it catches in his throat. He simply fall silent for a moment… disillusioned, no doubt.
"You're beautiful," Char submits, standing up before her. "There aren't very many Pokémon who are as beautiful as the legendaries. And of all the legendaries, you are one of the most beautiful."
"Thank you!" she squawks. "You are beautiful too!"
"Uh…"
"Fire… is beautiful," she says fondly, staring at him. "The way it glows, and changes, like the wind and the stars, so there is light when the sun is gone… It is mighty, dangerous… I sometimes want to be a fire Pokémon."
Char looks floored at this complement. He simply sits back down, speechless …Just as I was, when Nameless said the same thing to me.
... ... ...
That night, I am happy as I nod off to sleep.
Lily is beside me. Nameless is flying somewhere; she doesn't need sleep, since she just woke from hibernation. It's much colder without her to stifle the weather, but we'll be fine. And Scythe is off somewhere in quiet reflection, like he usually is at night.
Me… I'm laughing.
After dinner, I had decided that tomorrow would be the day I would insist that Char wear his fireproof tunic, just as he promised he would. So, when I went to replace the bag which contained the last remaining Golden Apple, I shifted through the supplies I had placed in there personally…
…and I realized I had forgotten to pack it.
I wrack my brain, wondering why and how I could have missed such an important article of clothing… it was right there, in my team's bag, right on top. There was no earthly way I could have avoided it while I was transferring the supplies over…
So, I give Char a very rude awakening, knocking him upside the head and demanding to know if he'd taken the tunic. He tells me very plainly that the thief who had taken the map also removed the tunic upon his order, and stashed it somewhere back at the base, so that I wouldn't find it when I was packing. And he says this all with a clever little smirk on his face which I will swear was copied from Scythe.
And so, the realization hits me… I could outwit Scythe in a mind game, yet I couldn't outwit the little Charmander.
Clever little human.
I congratulate him on his silly and possibly fatal victory, and I remind him that he has no further right to complain about the cold. He tells me he wouldn't have had a right to complain about the itch, either, so now he's even.
Bah.
I can't be angry at him. I'm proud, actually. Scythe is already teaching him well how to get what he wants from Pokémon who disagree with him.
So… I'm lying with my back against the rock, laughing to myself at the absurdity of Char's stunt, ready to let my mind drift away and recharge for the night… when Nameless swoops down from the sky and beckons me. She whispers, something she does not normally do.
"Prince, may we talk?" she asks me. "I… must say something to you… in secret."
So, I climb out of the ditch and follow her several yards to the east, where she stops and spreads her wings, as though to shield our conversation from eavesdropping.
"What is it?" I ask of her. "What's wrong?"
"The… green one… What is he called…" she says nervously. "With blades."
"Scythe," I tell her. "What, what's wrong with Scythe?"
"He asked to… to speak with me, just now…" she admits hesitantly. "And in secret… he asked me… to help him."
I scratch my forehead. This sounds odd. I wait for her to continue…
"He asked if I would help him, understand?" she says again. "Understand, Prince?"
"Yes, but, what did he need help with?" I respond. "And… what did you say to him?"
"He told me… he needs me to battle you," she whispers. "After returning from the tower, he asked if I… would help to knock you unconscious."
What…?
"He… might be an enemy, Prince!" the Articuno says with urgency. "He is… against you!"
"No, no…" I assure her. "He is not an enemy. The only enemy is his silence."
She blinks in confusion, so I reword my metaphor.
"He is planning something, but he refuses to tell me what it is," I explain. "If only he would tell me, I would be able to assist him with whatever he needs. But… he refuses to tell me. So… I suppose it is up to me to figure it out for myself."
"I will watch him!" Nameless hisses, ruffling her feathers. "I will not let him hurt you or the little ones! I will stop him if he tries to!"
"Easy, easy, Nameless," I say in a soothing voice, knowing that a lethal blizzard will form if she grows angry. "He will not harm them… If he is not planning to attack until after the tower mission is complete, you need not worry now. He is a good ally."
"What about after you return from the tower?" Nameless asks skeptically. "Will he still be a good ally after?"
And I don't know how to respond to her.
You see… up until this point, I assumed that Scythe just didn't want me to be involved with the Temporal Tower mission. I assumed he needed to, for some reason which I did not know, bring Char to the time dragon all on his own. Due to his failure to communicate anything to me, I had assumed he just wanted me out of the picture altogether.
But… After?
I scratched my forehead again. This was confusing. Because, if he wasn't planning to put his plan into action until after the mission ended… If he was, the entire time, entirely willing to let me scale the tower with him…
…Perhaps this plan of his has nothing to do with the tower at all.
…And perhaps… I am in huge trouble.